Graduation.
I haven’t been here in a while. I had such great ambitions for keeping up with a blog too. That was sarcasm. Here’s the short version of what has happened since my last post. I got engaged, I’m taking exams, I’m graduating, I’m applying to move to Japan in the summer, and quitting my job.
Onto getting engaged. I probably ought to split this into several posts, but I’ll do that later. I love my girlfriend, and I always wanted to marry her. I just had planned to do it after the Japan thing. She said she wanted to go though, so we looked into it and we needed to be hitched for the Japanese government to allow us to be placed together. So we talked about getting a courthouse marriage and whatnot, but she complained that it would sour her dream wedding.
Girls are crazy like that. Really.
Me, being the badass I am, called up my best friend who is a jeweler, got a ring made, booked a flight and rental car, and wove a net of lies so strong you could catch a rocket propelled Tyrannosaurus Rex in it. This all took place in two weeks. Having a custom made ring leap from idea to at my doorstep in a week is an awesome feeling. I took the aforementioned awesome and plane tickets and flew out to Oklahoma. I had paid off my girlfirend’s little sister to help me on the side. I also had to call the Dad and ask permission.
I did that when I was driving home one night. He was pumped about it too.
I land in Oklahoma, get the car. I have never seen an uglier car. It was this electric blue PT Cruiser. Real inconspicuous. I hopped in and started driving. My destination was an hour away. I didn’t have directions. I was going on about 3 memories of riding passenger in the past two years. All I was really sure of was that I was gonna drive on a toll road, so I packed some change.
I don’t get lost, I drive right into her home town in a blue blaze of badass-awesome, buy flowers at a Wal-Mart, and change into my tuxedo at a gas-station bathroom. God is giving me victory arm pumps at this point because of how glorious things are going. I drive to her work. I have made it two her parking lot 15 minutes before her shift is half-way over. The optimal time to propose.
She had no idea.
I park my blue bullet in the parking lot, and like the chain of events after Jesus’ last supper, things got a little out of hand. I was drowning in nervousness. Most people who know me can attest that I’m as placid as can be. If I woke up one morning as a female centaur, my reaction would probably be, “Ok.” But I was nervous now, I was watching the vintage bullshit not digital clock in the blue bomber tick slowly by. Then the woman called.
She was on lunch, and was calling on her break.
My net of lies held strong and even as I walked into the very building she was eating in, wearing a tuxedo holding flowers and a ring, she had no idea I was there. I ran into her friend and cut her a slice of my awesome pie. She agreed to play diversion. I went and called her out of work, they told her someone was in the front and wanted to talk to her.
People had gathered to watch. Guy in a tux with flowers? Yeah, something is happening.
I ducked behind a wall, her friend distracts her and leads her over.
Shrieks and screams as the angels in heaven give a toast and God and Jesus give high fives, when my future wife notices me.
You see, I had always joked that one day I would show up where she worked in a tuxedo and flowers, and rescue her from where she worked. She actually thought that is what was going on. She had also called me a liar for not doing this until now.
I weave a good net.
She said it was the best surprise ever. I say, “You can’t call me a liar now. I have one more surprise for you. Will you marry me?”
Shrieks, screams, squeals, and other loudness happened, and somewhere in there. Amongst all the looks as people came to see, there was a, “Yes.”
The only really important thing to note after this is immediately after this happens, her friend leaned in and said, “I think its a fake.”
December 12th, 2007 at 5:41 pm by rl